After the Big Fat Indian Wedding, we were off to do the “Golden Triangle tour” of Delhi, Agra and Jaipur. Our friend, Neha (the bride!), recommended a travel agent who helped us put together all of our lodging, transport and itineraries. Normally, Marine and I are such planners that we would take care of these reservations ourselves, but we were in a time crunch, so we outsourced!

Delhi

When we arrived in Delhi, we were mentally prepared for an entirely new chapter in our trip. Friends and locals from the wedding had given us fair warning about the air, the water, and the dreaded “Delhi belly”. Unfortunately, colonization and years of poor political leadership has led the country to a rough place. We heard from many people that the recent heads of state have actually worked to improve quite a lot of these problems, but there is still a long way to go. Here are some important things you need to know before you go to prevent yourself from becoming sick.

General Safety

We noticed the poor air quality minutes before the plane touched down in Delhi. Visibility was about 400 feet, and a thick blanket of brown covered the surface of the city. Sensitive groups were advised to wear surgical masks, and to keep air conditioning on at all times. We were also told to only drink bottled water that was purchased at a grocery store or provided by the hotel. We were warned that sometimes food stands or small retailers will rebottle water that is unsafe for foreigners to drink, as we haven’t developed the same immunities that most Indians have. In relation to the water, we were also told to be careful about what we eat. Eating at the hotel, or at recommended restaurants kept us totally fine. If in doubt, eat vegetarian and avoid fresh fruit and veggies- make sure they are fully cooked.

Sightseeing

With those tips in mind, we were off on our adventure! After landing in Delhi, our first stop was the Qutub Minar. It’s a UNESCO world heritage site of ruins, with the 73 meter tall Minaret standing as the centerpiece. So much of these ruins are still in great shape, and have etchings from the Quran still legible. We stayed out for about an hour, before we had to retire for the evening. Our lungs were still adjusting to the air, and it took about a day to fully acclimate.

The next day, under the hazy fog of morning, we set off to see the Jama Masjid. The Jama Masjid is one of the largest mosques in all of India, and was built between 1644 and 1656 from red sandstone and marble. It was built under Shah Jahan’s reign (the builder of the Taj Mahal), and is an incredible example of Mughal architecture. It was hard not to be in awe of the 400 year old structure that survived the British threat of destruction, multiple terrorist attacks, and the daily barrage of tourists!

Getting Around

If you did not learn to drive in India, I’d recommend staying off the roads yourself, and instead getting a driver. Painted lanes and traffic lights in India are more of a subtle suggestion, and to the outsider, traffic can be anxiety inducing. You can employ a tuk tuk for local sightseeing, or for about $12-15 a day, you can have someone drive you from sight to sight, and not worry about dodging elephants on the freeway.

We made a pit stop at Mahatma Gandhi’s memorial place before carrying on to Humayun’s Tomb. The tomb was commissioned by Humayun’s wife and widow and is said to have inspired the building of the Taj Mahal. It is an impressive red sandstone and marble structure, built in 1570 to honor the Mughal emperor.

Entry Fees (and why you should get over them)

There are usually two lines for tickets everywhere you go, one for Indian citizens, and one for foreign tourists. The foreign ticket line is ALWAYS shorter, usually prefers taking payment in cash, and the ticket fees are 5-10x more expensive than the Indian citizen tickets. We had been warned about this fact, so we were not upset or surprised by it. In fact, we simply referred to it as the “colonizer tax”. Considering the fact that the US dollar to Rupee conversion is about 67 Rupees per one US dollar, our tickets were still relatively inexpensive by US standards. If an Indian ticket was 50 Rupees (that’s only 70 cents!!), than the foreign ticket usually was about 500 Rupees, which is a crazy inflation, but only about $7 US. So suck it up, buttercup.

Before ending the day, we stopped at India Gate. India Gate is considered the “Arc de Triomphe” of the East, and serves as a memorial for the Indian soldiers that fought and died in the British Indian Army during the first World War. It was an impressive structure, but the crowd there was a little overwhelming and a lot of hawkers were trying to sell us trinkets and street food, so we didn’t stay for very long.

Our last day in Delhi was spent at the Akshardham Mandir. It is like Hindu Disneyland. There is a museum, water show, and large Mandir temple full of ornate carvings and art. We have zero photos from the Akshardham because no cameras or phones are allowed on the grounds. It’s not a historic place, as it was only built in 2005, but Hindu folks travel from far and wide to worship and learn here.

LGBT travel in India

As in most places, the Akshardham also had seperate lines of entry for men and women. We started to notice this pattern everywhere, from the airport to the Taj Mahal, and found ourselves wondering how frustrating (at best) or dangerous (at worst) it would be for a trans or non-binary person to navigate India. One would constantly have to choose “ladies” or “gents” for most entry or security lines, and would rarely, if ever find a gender-neutral restroom. Staring is also common, and as two white, cisgender women, we were stared at frequently. I imagine that our trans or non-binary friends would experience this tenfold, and could open themselves to potential harrassment. I don’t feel comfortable saying that India is a place that my trans and non-binary friends should visit at this time, unless accompanied by a local that they trust. I am hopeful that this will eventually change, as we learned that the people are quite open-minded.

During the wedding, we never felt that we had to hide who we are as a queer or lesbian couple, and were genuinely accepted by the friends we met and made there. We were advised to simply avoid PDA, which is the case for straight folks as well. In fact, walking through the streets we saw only men holding hands with other men, and only women holding hands with other women, so I’d even say we had a bit of an advantage. The folks that we did end up coming out to, if ever, were all very accepting, and hasty to inform us that India had recently made homosexuality legal.

Agra

It was about 5 hours from Delhi to Agra, and we only slowed down briefly because a dense fog had settled over the freeway. When we arrived, we went first to the Agra fort. The driver had arranged a guide to take us through the fort, which was on a hill top with a view of the Taj Mahal. We learned that it was where Shah Jahan lived with his family, and later was imprisoned there by his own son in a grab for power. We were also told that it used to have impressive tapestries, Persian carpets, gold plated ceilings, and hand crafted furniture before the British stole all of it.

British Influence

It became a common joke that everything would be so ornate and lux if it hadn’t been for the Brits. Every museum and monument lamented the fact that so many of the countries gems had been stolen. The Brits did leave a few things behind though, like the fact that English is largely spoken, cars are driven on the left side of the road, and afternoon tea is often served. It made me sad to think that Europe still has so much of the world’s treasures, and often charges folks to see their stolen goods.

Cottage Industries and Shopping

Our tour guide took us to a shop filled with Persian style carpets after the tour to see how they are made. People from the Kashmir region learned this style of carpet making, and brought it to tourist destinations when factories were closed in efforts to preserve monuments. We ended up with a small rug that we absolutely love, but we did have to bargain, and were expected to buy. If you do end up in one of these shops, don’t answer too many questions, or be vague! We were asked if we were students or working, and why we were in India. It seemed innocent enough, but if we made the mistake of saying we were no longer students, we were upsold aggressively. This happened again with an inlaid marble shop (we did buy something special for our friend who watched our cat and houseplants), but in Jaipur we expressly told our guide that we were done shopping!  

The Taj Mahal

We awoke early on the 2nd morning in Agra to see the crown jewel of our trip, the Taj Mahal. Cars cannot drive up to the ticket counter in an effort to decrease the effects of pollution on the marble, so we took a stroll. The fog was still lifting, the birds were quietly chirping, and the monkeys were stirring. If you plan on seeing the Taj, leave your snacks and gum at home or in the car! There are monkeys EVERYWHERE. It’s amazing, and they won’t bother you, unless of course you have snacks (they’re kinda like myself that way).

The Taj Mahal is as impressive up close as it is from afar. It took 20,000 laborers 20 years to complete, and it is a masterpiece of marble work. There are hand carved relief sculptures, and inlaid marble tiles with real semiprecious stones like Jasper, Onyx, Lapis, Turquoise, Malachite, Mother of Pearl and more. It was built by Shah Jahan, as a tomb for his late wife. Her remains lie directly in the center of the Taj, and yes, you can go inside and see her sarcophagus, but you cannot take photos. At first, I thought it was odd that her remains line up perfectly symmetrically with the entire property (from the exterior fountains to the tile floor), and that his body lies oddly to her left. I found out later that a foundation had been poured directly on the other side of the river, behind the Taj Mahal, for what was going to be his final resting place. It was going to be the black Taj Mahal. Could you even imagine if there had been two yin and yang Taj’s?? It was never completed though, because his son had locked him away in Agra fort!

After seeing the Taj, we continued our trip to Jaipur, and stopped along the way at Fatehpur Sikri. It was a town founded in 1569 and is a stunning mixture of both Hindu and Mughal architecture, but it was abandoned nearly 30 years later for lack of consistent water. In all its splendor, engineering and grandeur, it was a failure. It is now incredibly well preserved ruins. After exploring the site, we continued on to Jaipur.

Jaipur

Our full day in Jaipur was the last day of sightseeing, as we were headed back to Hyderabad the next day. We had a lot of sights to fit into one day, so we started at the Hawa Mahal, or the Palace of Winds. It’s an impressive facade, built for the ladies of the palace to be able to look out onto the bazaar and not be seen by the public.

After that we headed up to the Amber fort, and the Chand Baori (or step well). At one time, the step well was where locals got their water, and gathered socially. Nowadays, it’s more of an impressive feat of architecture than a functional step well. After observing the well, we continued to the fort. There is a line up of elephants waiting to take tourists up to the fort, and we opted not to ride due to reports that they are often mistreated. It’s important to us that when we travel, we avoid opportunities like elephant riding, or having a photo taken with a drugged tiger. We would rather see the animals thriving in their environment, like our trip last year to Costa Rica, where both zoos and keeping indigenous animals as pets, are illegal.

The Amber Fort was stunning- halls of mirrors, secret passageways and miles of fortress walls over rolling hills had us envisioning a time long past. We continued with a pit stop to photograph the fog lifting over the Jal Mahal, which is essentially a floating palace on a lake that the government hopes to eventually turn into a fine dining restaurant. After, we found ourselves at the astrological museum, or Jantar Mantar. The astrological museum was completed in 1734, and is now a UNESCO world heritage site. It’s full of massive sundials and instruments that are still accurate to this day, and probably always will be.

The City Palace

Our final stop of the day was the City Palace, which is still a functioning home of the royals who live in Jaipur. Marine even got lucky enough to catch a glimpse of the prince escaping the grounds into his Maserati (I was distracted taking photographs)! It contains it’s own hall of mirrors, intricately designed sitting rooms, and a temple painted in striking blue and white to honor the god, Rama, who is always depicted with blue skin. We observed the famous and ornate peacock gate, and took in views of the entire city from the rooftop of the palace. After, we were treated to masala chai tea and butter cookies. Because the palace is still privately owned, entry isn’t cheap, so you can always opt for just the museum instead. It was a nice departure to find ornate art that the Brits didn’t steal!

India is an incredible, sometimes painful place. Yes, there is poverty and filth and corrupt politicians like most of the colonized world. There is no way to sugar coat it, no matter how sweet the chai is.

However, while we were there, every media outlet was covering a wall of women over 300 miles long, protesting for the right to enter a Hindu temple. When a shopkeeper asked if Marine and I were friends, I came out to him. He said he could tell Marine was the husband in the relationship and I rolled my eyes at him, saying it’s only because of her short hair. He said “no, it’s because she kept telling you to pick out whatever you wanted.” I turned red at my own assumption, but he laughed with us. India’s people will move her in the right direction, even if she drags her feet. Perhaps, one day, she’ll be running.